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Hi guys
My relationship with my ex is pretty much none existent. She is extremely bitter and jealous by the fact that I ( after several years of her verbal and abusive behaviour) left her. I met my now wife approx 9 months after we separated so it was nothing to do with any infidelity etc. Purely because I had fallen out of love with her and I couldn’t take her ways anymore.
Fast forward 4 years and and my now 5 year old daughter ( who was 1 when we split) is now being manipulated and turned against me to the point where I’ve pretty much given up fighting ( after 3 court cases )
My ex belittles me to my daughter and she is forbidden to even mention my name when at home. I was , after a long court battle, awarded every other weekend fri - sun and a midweek for tea. Plus the usual alternative Xmas / bday.
I just don’t know how to handle her. I honestly thought after so long she would have grown up and ‘ got over me’ but it’s not getting any better. I know 100% it is jealously of that fact that I am happy , have another child and living a life I could only ever dream of. I do not rub it in her face at all , I fact the opposite and keep things very private .
She uses my daughter like a weapon and regularly stops contact just because she feels like upsetting me or stirring things up.
I often have thought that when she finds someone else that the jealousy will stop but although she’s had a couple of short term relationships she doesn’t change her bitterness.
It’s now had a negative impact on my daughter who is slowly taking her mums opinion of me. She’ll tell my wife that she’s not allowed to do things with her “ because mummy said so” and it’s caused a huge divide in my family unit . It’s so difficult not to ‘ bite back’ and tell my daughter the truth about her toxic mother.
I’m currently not seeing my daughter as the ex stopped contact again and we’re back in court for the 4th time in 4 years. Where do I draw the line? How do I live a happy and peaceful life with an ex like this?
I’m sure there’s plenty of people dealing with bitter and jealous ex’s , any help or advice ?
hi,
that must be a very tough situation. I hope the court draws a line and make an effort to enforce the order properly or dish out some kind of punishment. Not sure where you draw the line. must be exhausting and stressful, making repeat court applications. one thing you could look at doing if/when you next see your child, is spend time with her separately. not ideal, but may help avoid tensions with your wife.
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