DAD.info
Free online course for separated parents
Forum - Ask questions. Get answers.
Free online course for separated parents

Mediation

It’s that time of year again where your hand goes to pocket…no it not Christmas, its mediation time.

 

Another round of not being able to reach an agreement regarding contact dates and I have to pay to have a third party mediate the discussions. Whilst I agree that mediation is a great idea in many cases, I resent the fact the every time we have a disagreement it’s presented as the first port of call. Every time it is like resetting the switch and I feel that I have to prove and establish the basic points of contact. In my case it is my ex wife agreeing that I can’t always see my children on the dates I would like. She dictates because I work on a Saturday, her belief is that mid-week overnights shouldn’t happen…….

The government views mediation as a way of easing the court time taken up by divorces and encouraging parents to deal directly is a good idea, but this fails to account for people’s reluctance to make agreement due to personal histories or having an axe to grind. So I am now waiting to organise a time- which is in itself problematic, as is the location – a 60 minute drive to a suitable office in the middle of the working day  is currently being suggested, and the time lunchtime ……..so my ex can just pop in on her lunch!!!

I do like mediation though, as having an outsider say that you’re being reasonable does help with my self confidence about  my case, but the fact mediation isn’t binding makes a mockery of the process. Twice I have agreed stuff in mediation only to have my ex wife change her mind and then we both end up paying for court time and my point being supported by the judge.  There is no redress that my ex wife has broken both of the mediation agreements …so it ends up being a waste of time and money…but here we are again and I need to pay again, so off I go for mediation part four …….

Until next time .
Marc.

 

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the blogger and do not necessarily represent the views of Dad.info.

Related entries

VLOG: EVOLVING FATHERHOOD ROLE AND RELATIONSHIP BONDS

VLOG: EVOLVING FATHERHOOD ROLE AND RELATIONSHIP BONDS

“I think that sometimes if you try and tighten the bonds and be more controlling – are you going to then create resentment in your children? Are you going to create a situation where they look at you and go, “don't really like what me dad's doing? I feel constricted.”...

VLOG: EVOLVING FATHERHOOD ROLE AND RELATIONSHIP BONDS

Children’s Parties

Planning a children's party? Follow these top tips... When my son turned six last week we didn’t have a party, given our situation my ex felt it wasn’t appropriate and anyway the class hadn’t had big parties this year and we didn’t have to pay any back. It is a sad...

Latest entries

Fun and easy Easter activities for kids

Fun and easy Easter activities for kids

It's not always easy to think of ways to keep kids entertained during the Easter holidays! So, we have gathered together some great, simple ideas for Easter activities for kids to keep them busy. These activities also result in lovely items that they can decorate the...

How to help a bullied child

How to help a bullied child

For parents, bullying is always a concern. With our child's school lives being mostly a mystery, it can be hard for parents to keep on top of their social interactions, and know how to help a bullied child should they need to. The Anti-Bullying Alliance has found that...

Pin It on Pinterest