If you’ve ever been in a particularly stressful parenting situation (and let’s face it, who hasn’t), you’ll know that sorting the issue at hand can be a battle between your nerves and your child’s behaviour. Nappy explosion in the park? Vomiting on a day out? Epic meltdown over an ice cream? Those stressful incidents can leave you feeling exhausted and mentally drained.
So, how can you implement a calmer way of approaching parenting, for a better outcome all round?
As the scouts say, be prepared
Take items with you in the car/ stashed under the buggy so that various eventualities can be dealt with. You might include:
-a variety of snacks to ward off hunger tantrums
-a change of clothes for the little one, should a leak occur
-a tonne of nappies and wipes
-a spare dummy, if your child uses them
-plasters for any cut knees
-drinks and toys.
Consider kids’ energy levels
This might seem limiting but small children can be horrors after a missed nap time. If you want to avoid the chances of stress on a trip out, factor in their need for sleep.
Similarly, take it easy with packing too much into the days. Kids get easily overtired, so if they have too much on their plate for the day ahead, maybe skip the trip to see nanny or the playdate you’ve got planned.
Get some respite for yourself
Parenting is HARD. Don’t underestimate the need for a breather, no matter how much you love your kids. Schedule in a babysitter, or ask a family member to look after the little ones while you have a few hours to yourself. It’s vital for your wellbeing. Just a few hours doing whatever you like to do- even if that’s just walking the dog- is enough.
Your reactions have a ripple effect
When confronted with a screeching child, it can feel like too much to take, and your tense reaction can cause further tension in the situation. Before you react, take a breath. Remember that this short moment will pass. If a child needs comforting, talk to them in a calm voice and have a cuddle together. If they’re in the midst of a tantrum, keep in mind that it will soon be over, and use a measured voice while talking to them.
Create house rules and routines
When everybody knows the lay of the land, life is a little less chaotic. If children are old enough to contribute, get together and make a list of house rules- such as ‘everybody helps make dinner’, or ‘rudeness isn’t tolerated’. This can be pinned up on the fridge for all to remember.
Children love routines- they may not be able to verbalise this, but they respond positively to knowing what will happen when. Create a routine for before school- e.g. wash face, brush teeth, etc- and a bedtime routine too. Kids find comfort in routine, and you’ll likely find it helps them sleep better, too.
A planned week is a stress-free week
A week planner or diary of the week’s events can help you feel in control of family life. Noting down everything from school events to dentist appointments ahead of time means you can arrange life easier and have more calm in the house.
It also means you can plan in some you-time, which gives you further peace of mind.
Are you a stressed-out parent? Come and have a chat on our friendly forum.
