Dear Lost Dad,
I can only imagine how you are feeling right now. I am sure you are feeling a
rollercoaster of emotions and are feeling protective towards your children and
their thoughts and feelings on this.
I agree that your children may be feeling confused right now, particularly as
they are probably still adjusting to you and their mum separating and trying to
settle into a new way of life and a new normal for them.
Unfortunately, there is little you can actually do about your ex-partner
introducing her new partner to your children. But what you can do is focus on
your relationship with your children. You will always be their dad.
Try not to see your ex’s new man as competition to you. Keep seeing your children
regularly, telling and showing them how much you love them and that you will
always be there for them and will always be their dad.
By continuing to build and maintain strong relationships with your children
they will know that you will always be there for them and will always be their
dad, no matter who else is living with them or around them. You can’t be
replaced.
When you are with your children, try not to ask them questions about their
mum’s new partner, as you don’t want them to feel they have to choose
between you and him. Try not to feel jealous of the new man, stay strong and
above all really enjoy and take advantage of the time you do have with your
children. Quality time with them will always outweigh quantity time.
Debbie
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